Blah Blah Flowers

In what I assume is either a report which will be quickly denied tomorrow or a present for me because God considers me one of his special cherubs, the Catholic Church has decided that some parts of the Bible were not literally true. In what worryingly sounds like common sense coming from Vatican City (so you'll understand why I have to take this with a Dead Sea's worth of salt) the Church has said that some of the Bible contains symbolism and metaphor and should not be taken literally. Now all the Catholics have to do is give up this equally silly idea that making sure Priests aren't gayers will stop the straight ones being Paedophiles and they may be ready to enter the second half of the twentieth century.

I wait for the denials of this story tomorrow, or for the Times to admit they were mistaken, as absolutely no-one else seems to be carrying this story...